One of Those Days

The summer before I got pregnant with Preston I started working at a coffee shop. That started my love of coffee and I learned how to make all the specialty drinks. So, tonight I decided to make myself one. I had a really rough day and decided to use the good coffee. (extra bold starbucks) As I opened the bag of ground I paused for a minute to breath in the amazing smell. Suddenly I was back in college....back before I was pregnant. Life was so easy. Of course I didn't think it was easy at the time. If I had only known how good it was. Don't get me wrong. I love my life now. However, life is considerable more difficult. I rarely let myself think about how my live might have been if I had never gotten pregnant with Preston. For those of you who don't know....James and I were sophomores in college when I got pregnant. It's a super long and complicated story but in short form....We found out I was pregnant, one week later withdrew from school and the next day we broke up (not really out choice) and James went back up to Vermont. I didn't see him again till Preston was 3 months old. The time in between was the hardest 12 months of my entire life. Obviously, we worked everything out and are now married and have had two more beautiful children. Life has happened so fast. Four years ago I still had 2 1/2 yrs of college left and thought that James and I would get married in 2009, wait a few years and then think about having a family. Never did I think that in four years I would be married with three kids. I had planned my life to be calm and simple. I thought James and I would have weekly date nights and do all these cool things before we got tied down with kids. We laugh about that now. Since we have been married (2 1/2 yrs) we have gone on maybe seven dates. Now James is deployed and life is even more insane. Today was one of those days that makes me wonder if I can really handle this. I didn't sleep well last night....maybe 5 hours of restless sleep. Madison woke up at 6am (2 hours early) and is apparently teething. (Teething never really bothered the boys that much. Madison is a different story. She has been cranky all day long.) So, I get up, get Madison fed and tried to have her play on the floor while I rest a little bit longer. However, my head was pounding and couldn't rest. Then about an hour later the boys got up. I got them breakfast and sat down to drink some coffee and check FB and e-mail. As I am sitting there Landon climbs up on a chair beside me, flashes a huge smile and then spit a mouthful of chewed up biscuit into my coffee. That was just the beginning of the mischievousness. A few highlights.....Landon spit in my coffee. Preston or Landon (not sure which) decide Madison was hungry and gave her a biscuit to munch on. (she doesn't eat solids yet) Preston figured out how to open up the freezer and climb up the front of the fridge.....he wanted a piece of ice. I lost Madison.....she was hiding with Preston under a pile of blankets. (at least they thought it was funny) And then I found Preston in the dryer....naked. I actually find the mischievousness quit funny. What made my day so difficult was the pounding headache, Madison's crankiness and Landon was clingy all day. Oh and the trash was smelling (yay for diapers) and I didn't get a chance to take it to the dumpster till later in the afternoon.....that really really bothered me....probably because it was not helping my headache. So, once the day started rough every other little thing just seemed magnified. James being on a night shifts and not able to call is not helping. If Preston has to go a long time without talking to daddy you can really tell it bothers him. At least 3 times today, totally without warning, he broke into tears and just cried for daddy. So, we looked at pictures of daddy. He seemed better after dinner and even decided to pick up all the toys in the living room for me. By 8pm they were all in bed and I had managed to get all the cleaning done. So, I guess all is well that ends well. My house is now quiet and I enjoyed an amazing cup of coffee. There are moments that I miss the simplicity of life before kids. However, I look at my life.... I'm 23 yrs old and God has already given me everything I dreamed of. Ever since I was a little girl I wanted to grow up, get married and have 3 kids....and I wanted 2 boys and then a girl. God gave me my wish list. I have an amazing husband and my 3 beautiful babies. There will always be rough days. Today was one of those days...but tomorrow is always a new day with no mistakes in it.